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The Slime of Your Life
As if we needed a reminder that the upcoming election is poised to become the most embarrassing, shame-filled miasma of our lifetimes, a 527 group calling themselves Citizens United Not Timid has been formed to ensure that the Truth About Hillary Clinton is "fully revealed."

The organization - founded by veteran right-wing hatchet man Roger Stone, has taken great pains to make sure the first letters in their name (C.U.N.T.) always appear in boldface — you know, so you don't miss the ingenious play on words. In fact, if you cough up twenty-five bucks, they'll send you a T-Shirt emblazoned with this handsome-yet-subtle logo...


...perfect for your next serpent-handling ritual, Okie noodling picnic or NASCAR weekend, eh?

Now, don't confuse the guys & gals at C.U.N.T. with Citizens United, another anti-Hillary group who actually went to the trouble of making a movie about Hillary's ruthless lack of character, her seething hatred for America and her diabolically corrupt rise to power. That's a topic for a whole 'nother post.

Turns out that Stone - vicious little piece of shit that he is - is merely the man behind C.U.N.T.'s Oz-sized curtain of lowbrow dickery. Some guy named Jeff "Noodles" Jones, a local bartender and DJ (so-nicknamed because of his apparent resemblance to Robert De Niro's character in Once Upon a Time in America) ostensibly runs the group, along with his "handler," Scotty. As Matt Labash describes him, "Noodles" is "the sort of person you'd expect to have at least one hand in the local meth game and knee-deep in statutory rape allegations."

Actually, the origin of this 527 is pretty hilarious. As it turns out, "Noodles" sort of fell into the role of the frontman after the person who provided the inspirado for the organization turned out to be too dirty even for Stone:
A few nights prior, Stone had been interviewing a sinister Italian gentleman for the front man gig. It was a two-question interview. Stone kicked things off with, "Let me ask you, Angelo: I say 'Hillary Clinton.' Tell me the first word that comes to your mind, even if it's risqué." "[Special flower]," Angelo immediately replied. To which Stone followed with, "Would you be willing to tell other people you think that?" Angelo assented: "Abso-f'in'-lutely."

With the interview concluded, Angelo excused himself to the restroom, at which time one of Stone's friends asked, "Do you know who that is?" "No," Stone said, "Who is he? Nice guy." His friend explained, "He's one of the soldiers of the Lucchese family, has a record as long as your arm. I don't think he's the guy you want."
Whether Clinton or Obama gets the nomination, expect things to get a whole lot uglier from here on out. The slime peddlers are just gettin' warmed up. Question is, will the Dems let them get away with it again? And more importantly, are we willing to pay 'em back in spades this time around?

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From: Chicago
Mood: Bring It On.
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Comments
red_silk_robe From: [info]red_silk_robe Date: January 29th, 2008 08:41 am (UTC) (Permalink)
Oh he did NOT!

Oh he DID!

Oh Christ on a Rubber Crutch.

I sent this link to my boss ASAP :D

nebris From: [info]nebris Date: January 29th, 2008 09:06 am (UTC) (Permalink)
Another gem from the Dept of You Can't Make This Shit Up.

~M~
iron_chef_gein From: [info]iron_chef_gein Date: January 29th, 2008 01:29 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
The Dems will bend over and take it, as usual ... just like Pelosi and her band of Congressional catamites got down on their knees and joined Shrub's vote buying tax rebate movement. Can I get a party with some goddamn cajones?! And not the kind of cajones they're unloading down someone's throat in a public restroom?
plizak From: [info]plizak Date: January 29th, 2008 01:47 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
I'm starting to think a depression would be good. It would clean up the system which is a giant mess right now. Not just in America, but around the world. Maybe Russia could even get a real Democracy too!
shelleybear From: [info]shelleybear Date: January 29th, 2008 02:35 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
Question is, will the Dems let them get away with it again? And more importantly, are we willing to pay 'em back in spades this time around?

Yes
No.
Well strictly speaking I would be willing to.
But then again, I liked the scene from "Wizards" when Avatar pulls out a gun and blows his brother away.

You already know my opinion of Hilarity and my reasons for voting for her if she gets the nomination.
jblaque From: [info]jblaque Date: January 29th, 2008 03:20 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
"Well strictly speaking I would be willing to."

And you should, Shel. I still kick myself every day for not doing my fair share to keep Bush out of office in 2000 (and again in 2004). A new Republican in the White House in '09 is a lot more likely than most of my cocky Dem acquaintances think it is.

Granted, mine is just a tiny, insignificant voice reaching perhaps a few hundred people at best, but I guarantee you I'll be in full attack mode from now until election day, and it'll be worth every minute if I can change even a few minds at the ballot box. If thousands of other progressive bloggers, commentators and "pundits" with audiences far bigger than mine adopt/maintain the same "no prisoners" attitude, I'm confident we can put up a helluva bloody battle - and win (Pelosi, Reid and the spineless Democratic "leadership" notwithstanding). IMHO, the only way to beat these bastards is by resorting to their own, dirty tactics.

"RepublicanSmearMachine.com" is available. I can see myriad possibilities there.
deliverer From: [info]deliverer Date: January 30th, 2008 01:31 am (UTC) (Permalink)
I keep seeing that as saying "To Educate the Public about Hillary Clinton's vagina".
nova_42 From: [info]nova_42 Date: January 29th, 2008 02:50 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
i doubt it'll matter, Obama will probably be the nominee and this douche-bags organization won't really matter.
jblaque From: [info]jblaque Date: January 29th, 2008 03:01 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
The smears against Obama will be just as bad, if not worse. The racist undertones will be unmistakable.
nova_42 From: [info]nova_42 Date: January 29th, 2008 03:05 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
true, i can only hope he'll be ready
shelleybear From: [info]shelleybear Date: January 29th, 2008 03:19 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
I think Obama has taken that into account.
What I'm curious about, it how much crap McCain will throw at him.
It's sort of like watching a train wreck.
I mean, here's this guy who used to be honest and reasonable.
Now, let's see how low he can sink.

Edited at 2008-01-29 03:19 pm (UTC)
wobblerlorri From: [info]wobblerlorri Date: January 29th, 2008 03:19 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
That's an iron-clad given. I think though that there's enough over-sensitivity to any flavor of racism now that such a strategy will rebound very painfully on the Republicans. Not only will Dems vote for Obama as a conscience-assuaging gesture, but moderate and Goldwater Republicans will knock each other down voting for him, in a crazed effort to counteract the rabid dog tactics of the neo-cons and religious freakazoids.

I intend to vote for John Edwards in the upcoming primary (Stupid Tuesday), but if Obama gets the nod at the convention I'll support him. I just can't bring myself to support Hitlery... if she gets the nomination I'll likely not vote or write in Obama...
shelleybear From: [info]shelleybear Date: January 29th, 2008 03:21 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
Oh, I'll vote for her.
As I see it, she will speed up the balkanization clock by at least ten years.

Edited at 2008-01-29 03:22 pm (UTC)
kierthos From: [info]kierthos Date: January 29th, 2008 04:10 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
?

The balkanization of the United States?
shelleybear From: [info]shelleybear Date: January 29th, 2008 04:56 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
Economically, morally, theologically even historically America is a loosely connected fragile alliance of states and regions.
What holds it together is the belief that a single unit has greater power then several smaller ones.
I theorize that Hilarity will piss-off so many regions that it will make balkanization a more attractive possibility.
We are heading in that direction anyway.
Red states, blue states is a simplification of political mindsets.
There are lots more colors to the rainbow then red and blue.
kierthos From: [info]kierthos Date: January 29th, 2008 04:58 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
Hrm... sorta like the world of Crimson Skies then.
shelleybear From: [info]shelleybear Date: January 29th, 2008 05:00 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
Yep.
But hopefully less violent.
kierthos From: [info]kierthos Date: January 29th, 2008 05:13 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
I don't see how a break-up of the U.S. could be anything but very violent.
jblaque From: [info]jblaque Date: January 29th, 2008 06:46 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
Right-wing genocide. Now there's an interesting concept. ☺
kierthos From: [info]kierthos Date: January 29th, 2008 09:45 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
I tend to think the neo-cons are just a wee bit better armed then the liberals. Of course, if they're a true neo-con, they actually have no idea how the weapons work, or how war is supposed to be waged, so it may be back on an even footing.
jblaque From: [info]jblaque Date: January 29th, 2008 03:36 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
"...if she gets the nomination I'll likely not vote or write in Obama..."

Please think that over, Robinson. Whatever beefs you have with Clinton will pale in comparison with the horror of a McCain or Romney presidency. Iraq alone is reason enough to vote against them, regardless of who the Dem nominee turns out to be. Can you imagine another four (much less eight) years of a 'Pug in the White House?

I'm an Edwards man, myself (Obama being my second choice), but if Clinton gets the nod, she also gets my wholehearted, active support. This isn't about politics anymore. This is a war to take the country back. As an old friend, I urge you not to stay on the sidelines.
nova_42 From: [info]nova_42 Date: January 29th, 2008 03:46 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
my thoughts exactly!! you've been listening to a lot of her haven't you. stay away from my woman ;)
jblaque From: [info]jblaque Date: January 29th, 2008 03:57 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
LOL. I'm listening to her right now.

You'll have to fight me to the death for her affections, my friend.
nova_42 From: [info]nova_42 Date: January 29th, 2008 04:03 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
'm listening to her right now

so am i!!
ms_daisy_cutter From: [info]ms_daisy_cutter Date: January 29th, 2008 05:55 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
I think though that there's enough over-sensitivity to any flavor of racism now that such a strategy will rebound very painfully on the Republicans.

I doubt it. Not when the sort of crap described in this article can appear in a small-town newspaper in an upscale area of Long Island. And not when powerful groups like the Council of Conservative Citizens exert so much influence on politics.

If Obama is nominated, the GOP will use as many dog whistles as they think they can get away with to mobilize The Base against him. Given that the Right has convinced a lot of people over the last two decades that making fun of anybody who isn't straight, white, Christian, and male is "edgy" and "daring," I'm sure this strategy will be fruitful, despite (or maybe because of) any protests against it.
delicatetbone From: [info]delicatetbone Date: January 29th, 2008 03:07 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
Is it bad that I totally love that logo?
jblaque From: [info]jblaque Date: January 29th, 2008 03:42 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
Assuming you're even half-serious, I would've never expected a progressive woman like you to "love" anything about an organization named C.U.N.T. But as I said, for a mere $25, you can wear the logo on a T-shirt of your very own.
delicatetbone From: [info]delicatetbone Date: January 29th, 2008 03:45 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
Well, in a reappropriated fashion, I love using the word cunt and I actually really like the logo (the legs with the star on the crotch). I wouldn't wear a teeshirt with it on it because the way it's being used is totally not something I support.
delicatetbone From: [info]delicatetbone Date: January 29th, 2008 03:47 pm (UTC) (Permalink)

and

in fact, reading "Citizens United Not Timid" in relation to my crotch voting is kind of awesome. I'm not timid and neither is my cunt -- I'll unite with other folks that feel similarly :)
nova_42 From: [info]nova_42 Date: January 29th, 2008 03:55 pm (UTC) (Permalink)

Re: and

...and neither is my cunt

......i love you
jblaque From: [info]jblaque Date: January 29th, 2008 03:58 pm (UTC) (Permalink)

Re: and

Between Delicatetbone and Stephanie, seems you & I have the same taste in women...

En garde!

Edited at 2008-01-29 03:59 pm (UTC)
delicatetbone From: [info]delicatetbone Date: January 29th, 2008 04:06 pm (UTC) (Permalink)

Re: and

well thanks :)
nova_42 From: [info]nova_42 Date: January 29th, 2008 04:09 pm (UTC) (Permalink)

Re: and

you're quite welcome
shelleybear From: [info]shelleybear Date: January 29th, 2008 03:50 pm (UTC) (Permalink)

I Thought So!

Some guy named Jeff "Noodles" Jones, a local bartender and DJ (so-nicknamed because of his apparent resemblance to Robert De Niro's character in Once Upon a Time in America) ostensibly runs the group
scarybaldguy From: [info]scarybaldguy Date: January 29th, 2008 06:25 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
And if Obama gets the nomination, count on these yutzes to come up with something like Never I'm Gonna Get Elected, Really.
jblaque From: [info]jblaque Date: January 29th, 2008 07:02 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
See, I'm of the belief that bigoted little twerps like Stone are usually cowards as well. Picking on Hillary is one thing (little risk of actual, physical harm), but I don't think they'd have the stones to launch N.I.G.G.E.R. Their homes would (quite rightfully) go up in flames.
wobblerlorri From: [info]wobblerlorri Date: January 29th, 2008 09:52 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
Naw, it should be Now It Gets Good, Elect Republicans.

How about Stop Pandering Abortionist Democratic Elitists?

Or Citizens Of Obvious Negativism.

Damn, this is fun.
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