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Blaque's Blog of Horrors - How To Ruin A Teabagger's Week
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How To Ruin A Teabagger's Week
Just toss a little statistical accelerant at 'em...



• Percentage change, since 2001, of the number of white children in the U.S.: -9.8

• Percentage change, since 2001, of the number of black children in the U.S.: -2.3

• Percentage change, since 2001, of the number of Hispanic children in the U.S.: +38.8

That alone oughta send 'em straight into speaking tongues.

Quoting Chris Healey, via AddictingInfo (emphasis mine):

"The Tea Party, as we know them today, sprang forth soon after Barack Obama took office, and suddenly started protesting our terrible tax burden and seemed to believe that they had something in common with the colonists of 1773. Some even dressed in period costume; a sure sign they had a valid point.

Unfortunately,facts really aren’t on the Teabaggers' side. Recent, widely reported figures actually show that in real terms the tax revenue collected from Americans is actually the lowest it has been since Truman. Yep, the job killing, socialist, Marxist, Kenyan, radical, do-too-much, do nothing, Muslim president is actually in office during a time when our tax burden is lower than during Ronald Reagen and both George Bushes! And, unlike the Brit hating tea-tossers of '73, the average Teabagger in America does in fact have full democratic representation in exchange for their tax dollars.

The reality is our economy cannot really continue with such low taxation levels. Should you actually talk to a Teabagger or a Republican about what they actually want to cut, they may go into a little rant about welfare recipients and making government smaller, but in the real world they won’t actually address the elephant in the room: Military spending.

As a nation our military spending is over half a trillion dollars a year. Put another way, if every country in the world had their military spending displayed on a pie chart, the American slice would be 43%; almost as much as the entire rest of the world combined.

But does smaller government mean not having a military presence in over 150 countries to the average Teabagger or Republican? No, of course not. It seems they would rather spend their time trying to repeal ‘Obamacare’ so that we can return to a time when sick children were kicked off health care plans for being too sick, or too expensive to help. They will be quick to support the abolition of abortion because it is “killing babies” but when said babies are born into the world, if their parents are poor, tough luck; no Obamacare for you. You can just contribute to our embarrassingly high infant mortality figures (We’re currently 46th in the world, according to the CIA 2009 numbers – in case you're keeping score).

When you peel back the nonsense of the Tea Party and look under the hood, what you actually see are a bunch of selfish morons who basically dislike our President (or possibly any non-white person), want to pay little to no taxes, and want to cut social and welfare programs to anyone other than themselves. Much like the Republican controlled Congress, who recently implemented new ‘spending controls’ that were designed to cut ‘wasteful’ Democratic spending, but just so happened to contain exemptions for pretty much anything they wanted to spend money on.

So what does the Tea Party really stand for? According to their web site, they want “fiscal responsibility, limited government, and free market.” But despite the concept of fiscal responsibility there seems to be no clamor on the right to reduce our unsustainable military presence and spending around the world. When it comes to limited government, the average Teabagger seems to side with Republicans and demand that the government outlaw or severely curtail abortion and gay marriage rights, enact flag-burning laws, outlaw smoking pot, and so on and so forth. They seem to be down with a free market, but it’s a lack of regulation that caused a meltdown in our economy recently, not government interference or regulation.

Ultimately this is my issue with the Teabaggers: They're playing the role of an oppressed minority who are being terrorized by a big government machine hell-bent on stealing their guns, their liberty and life as they know it, all while increasing taxes. However, the reality is that the Teabaggers are mainly middle to upper class white people who want to “take our country back.” These people want lower taxes, despite the reality that they are about as low as they have been for a very long time. They want limited/small government, yet this seems to exclude the military spending and on issues they care about such as the prevention of gay marriage, abortion and potheads.

For all of these reasons, I’d like to call the Teabaggers out for their B.S. ...

- Don’t talk to me about small government if you're not planning on at least halving our military budget (which would still leave it three times higher than China’s).

- Don’t talk to me about free market and less government interference, when you seem to want the government to impose religious and moral ‘values’ on those of us who may not share said values.

- Don’t talk to me about wanting to pay less taxes, while you are supporting Republican handouts to millionaires...

In fact, take your stupid costume, your stupid, selfish ideas, your racism, and your small-minded bigotry and just don’t talk to me at all.

Tags: , , , , , ,
From: Chicago
Mood: determined Torch Their Dens

Comments
normalcyispasse From: [info]normalcyispasse Date: July 17th, 2011 11:52 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
Your newsletter, Sir, I would like to subscribe to it.
underlankers From: [info]underlankers Date: July 18th, 2011 12:14 am (UTC) (Permalink)
Only one problem with this: this assumes the Tea Partiers care about this physical world and other human beings as opposed to their little Montanist Christian heresy. ;P
kierthos From: [info]kierthos Date: July 18th, 2011 03:17 am (UTC) (Permalink)
Or that they can be swayed by such things as logic or facts.
serai1 From: [info]serai1 Date: July 18th, 2011 01:24 am (UTC) (Permalink)
Elegant and succinct. Reminds me of what Harlan Ellison once said to a douchebag fan who was whining about being entitled to his own opinion: "NO, sir. You're entitled to an informed opinion."

Great to see you around, dude. I've missed you!
jblaque From: [info]jblaque Date: July 18th, 2011 05:21 am (UTC) (Permalink)
That's awfully kind of you... thanks. :)
guinnevere_b From: [info]guinnevere_b Date: July 18th, 2011 02:17 am (UTC) (Permalink)
Hear him! Hear him! (Means I like what I'm hearing... well, reading, then.)
acelightning From: [info]acelightning Date: July 18th, 2011 04:22 am (UTC) (Permalink)
I'm beginning to be ashamed to drink tea...
*sigh*
lincard From: [info]lincard Date: July 18th, 2011 07:38 am (UTC) (Permalink)
Hmm, I love tea as well. So just do what I do an equate the term "tea-bagging" with its more... modern gaming euphemism :-D
acelightning From: [info]acelightning Date: July 18th, 2011 08:16 am (UTC) (Permalink)
Personally, I think the self-named "Tea-Baggers" ought to be tea-bagged till they gag...
jblaque From: [info]jblaque Date: July 18th, 2011 08:28 am (UTC) (Permalink)
I'm thinking Turkish Goggles and a Warm Carlos, at the very least.
lincard From: [info]lincard Date: July 18th, 2011 08:40 am (UTC) (Permalink)
What is... no. Hell no - forget I asked.

I KNOW NOTHING!!!

BRB, vomiting forever.
jblaque From: [info]jblaque Date: July 18th, 2011 09:01 am (UTC) (Permalink)
LOL... we used to have an indy wrestling league here in Chicago called "PCW" which featured the Latino tag team of 'Warm Carlos' and 'Dirty Sanchez'...

Try explaining those names to a nine-year old kid.
lincard From: [info]lincard Date: July 18th, 2011 10:21 am (UTC) (Permalink)
Oh man, too funny :-) Probably would have gone over the heads of many of the adults present though. AT ruined me for life (*laughs*)

When I was younger I had this misguided idea that honesty was the best policy when it came to explaining various things to kids under a certain age. Older and wiser now... :-o
acelightning From: [info]acelightning Date: July 19th, 2011 04:26 am (UTC) (Permalink)
Promises, promises... ;-)
lincard From: [info]lincard Date: July 19th, 2011 08:48 am (UTC) (Permalink)
hehehe... aye, all talk, sadly. You know, other than a bit of reflux during the night, I haven't regurgitated anything for well over a decade :-o
acelightning From: [info]acelightning Date: July 19th, 2011 10:40 am (UTC) (Permalink)
Oh, so you've managed to avoid lutefisk all this time? ;-)
lincard From: [info]lincard Date: July 20th, 2011 11:37 am (UTC) (Permalink)
And boiled sheeps heads etc, yes. Although BBQ whale does smell delicious...
acelightning From: [info]acelightning Date: July 19th, 2011 04:24 am (UTC) (Permalink)
As [info]lincard points out, they might enjoy that too much...
jblaque From: [info]jblaque Date: July 19th, 2011 03:23 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
An Angry Dragon or a Carpet Cleaner, perhaps...
acelightning From: [info]acelightning Date: July 20th, 2011 10:01 am (UTC) (Permalink)
Who thinks up these names, anyway?
jblaque From: [info]jblaque Date: July 23rd, 2011 05:12 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
I'm thinkin' Vinnie "Rumpleforeskin" Jordan, from beyond the grave.
lincard From: [info]lincard Date: July 18th, 2011 08:39 am (UTC) (Permalink)
The problem is you need to make the punishment fit the crime. And if you scratch beneath the surface, your average (male) Teabagger would most likely *enjoy* that.
acelightning From: [info]acelightning Date: July 19th, 2011 04:29 am (UTC) (Permalink)
(see above)
arthur_sc_king From: [info]arthur_sc_king Date: July 18th, 2011 05:57 pm (UTC) (Permalink)
Yes. Thank you.

These fucking losers who elected the fucking losers that constitute the 2010 GOP House caucus ... on the one hand, they deserve the kind of country they voted for ... on the other hand, what about the rest of us poor bastards?

After seeing gold crack US$1600 today, I'm selling most of my US stocks in my pension portfolio and putting them into my gold ETF until this debt ceiling bullshit is over. If they don't work something out, the US dollar is going to look like a peso next to the loonie, much less to the pound, euro, yen, and yuan. Oy.

Glad to see your smiling face, as it were.
sandman008 From: [info]sandman008 Date: July 19th, 2011 06:43 am (UTC) (Permalink)
When some Teabagger starts crying about how they "want their country back," it ain't the United States of America that they're talking about.
nova_42 From: [info]nova_42 Date: July 20th, 2011 03:10 am (UTC) (Permalink)
all i can say is: Fuck the Tea-Baggers
prodigal_lawyer From: [info]prodigal_lawyer Date: July 22nd, 2011 04:58 am (UTC) (Permalink)
I've just been so outraged at the idiocy of anyone supporting "tea party" ideology I can't even form words to describe it.
satyrblade From: [info]satyrblade Date: October 3rd, 2011 03:50 pm (UTC) (Permalink)

Here's What a REAL Public Uprising Looks Like...

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